Memories: Gotta catch ’em all

A few years ago on a trip to Europe, I distinctly remember walking through a museum (I think it was in Florence, but really, it doesn’t matter, does it?) and walking by hundreds of pieces of gorgeous artwork. Instead of taking them all in as I usually would, it suddenly occurred to me that a day, a month, a year later, I probably wouldn’t remember any of it.

Sure, I’d remember being there. I’d remember enjoying my time. But would I retain ever piece of art that I was looking at? Not a chance. In that case, I wondered, what was the point of experiencing something I could clearly never fully retain?

I think that it’s become human nature to hoard experiences (or approximations of them) to the best of our abilities. People used to take a roll or two of film on vacation, carefully picking and choosing which memories were worth preserving. Now, it’s easy to take hundreds of pictures in a single day. We’re obsessed with archiving every level of detail in our lives, right down to what we ate for brunch today (I mean, what else is Instagram for?).

With our newfound archiving powers (thanks, technology!) we’ve become obsessed with holding onto as much as we can. Just like pretty much everything, this is fantastic… until it isn’t. Back to art galleries, I used to find myself taking pictures of every single piece I liked. It felt so important at the time – how could I live with myself if I let myself forget all the cool stuff I was seeing? This mentality leads to a scary collection of photos like this:

And this is just the beginning.

Guess how many times I’ve gone back to look at this particular album in any detail? None, you say? Good guess! Looking back, I don’t really feel the need to relive this experience over and over – once was enough, and I have plenty to fill my mind now, thank you very much. I find my ever-growing archive of memories and artifacts to be slightly overwhelming and unwieldy.

It’s helpful to accept that sensory experiences are, by nature, fleeting, and that this is okay. I found myself thinking about this as I was sipping a particularly tasty cup of hot chocolate in Montreal a couple of weeks ago. As delicious as it was at the time, I wouldn’t hang on to the taste and the sensation once it was over. The idea of ‘being present’ is pretty trendy right now (to the point that writing the phrase made me cringe a bit), but the people preaching living in the now have a good point. Letting yourself experience things as they happen will likely lead to a much richer experience than trying so hard to capture them for posterity that you’re not actually enjoying them. That being said, I obviously took a photo of the aforementioned hot chocolate before I drank it. I am both a hypocrite and a product of my generation.


Related Listening

Actually, the only part that’s related is the title, but I’ll use any excuse to listen to Leonard Cohen.

There is room

So, the world is a pretty big place, and there is lots of room in it.

There is room for people who write novels, and those who just write tweets.

There is room for professional photographers, and room for obsessive Instagrammers.

There is room for whimsy, seriousness, and dark comedy.

There is room for deliberation, and room for apathetic dismissal.

There is room for art, and room for “content”.

There is room for depth and shallowness and every level in between.

There is room for people who won’t care about anything I just wrote!

There is room for disagreement.

And that’s pretty cool.

pigeons ahoy!

There is also room for many, many pigeons.

Learning to love constraints

Nothing makes me freeze up like starting a new creative project with absolute freedom to do whatever I want.

This might sound a bit strange. After all, isn’t creativity about thinking outside the box and about coming up with something new? Aren’t art and freedom of expression inextricably linked?

Well, yes and no. I used to think that truly creative individuals (as opposed to phonies like myself) created and invented effortlessly out of thin air. I figured that for the truly creative, making something from nothing is second nature, and since I always found staring down a blank canvas to be incredibly daunting, I must not actually be a creative person. No matter how much people would compliment my work, I always felt deep down like I was faking it, and I was terrified that someone would eventually find out.

Then I started to meet other creative people. I started to read articles and blog posts by artists I admired. It began to dawn on me that my experience and fear weren’t all that unique. Many artists, writers, designers, and even non “creative” people were experiencing the same feelings. I found some consensus that:

  • Starting a project is often the hardest part, and,
  • People are often at their most creative when working within a set of pre-defined boundaries.

I’d guess that different people require different types and amounts of boundaries. For me, they’re almost essential to getting anything done. This is why, for example, I’ve always felt more comfortable writing essays with an established topic than writing fiction. This is why when interior decorators are trying to decide what colour to paint a room, they’ll often build a palette around an object from the room. Without making some choices before starting out, possibilities are too limitless. I recently read about the “paradox of choice”: that people are often far happier when they have to choose between 3 options, for example, as opposed to 30. We feel stifled when we have no freedom to make creative choices, but completely overwhelmed when the options are limitless. Part of growing as an artist is discovering where that mythical balance lies (for yourself – I’d guess that it’s in a different place for each person).

This balance is part of what led me to favour design over art (at least most of the time). I’m at my best when I’m constrained by a set of problems – once I have issues to tackle, I can get to work and come up with interesting solutions. This isn’t to say that I don’t see value in making art – in fact, I love it (when it happens). I’m just more successful when I make a few choices in advance and let things go from there.

So, if you feel like a big faker because ideas don’t come easily to you in the beginning, don’t worry. It happens to everyone most people (OK, I’m sure there are some people who are naturally that good… jerks). Try imposing some boundaries on yourself and see what happens.

P.S. This post was inspired by the fact that I started this blog with too few constraints on myself. I mean, isn’t it great that I could have a space where I could write whatever the hell I want? Well, as it turns out… no.

Hey, it’s a blog!

Hi! I’m Dara. This is my new blog. First posts are always the hardest so I’ll get this one out of the way without really saying much of substance.

I’m starting off as a bad blogger because I don’t have a purpose or mission or focus for this site. I have no grand plans or aspirations. Really, I just want a reason to write (something I really miss since graduating from university) and a place to do it.

Some things that might appear here include:

  • Photos! I’m a hobbyist photographer and love to shoot just about anything on just about any kind of camera.
  • Projects I’m working on. By day I’m a web developer, but by night I do a lot of other (mostly designy, art-related) stuff
  • My apartment. I love decorating and making my living space great. Yes, I love Eames shell chairs, just like everyone else. No shame.
  • My random thoughts about life, and how to make it awesome.

Tulips in Istanbul

I like big butts and I cannot lie

My talk on HTML5 at Ladies Learning Code

This past Saturday (September 24th) I had the pleasure of speaking to the 60 participants signed up for the Ladies Learning Code “HTML & CSS for beginners” workshop about the future of the web.

Ahh, whoops, that’s not the right picture, is it? Let’s try that again. The future of the web!

That’s better. In my lightning talk, I gave a very brief introduction to the awesomeness that is HTML5 (and its friends – most of these things wouldn’t happen without JavaScript, too!). It was fun seeing lots of people get excited about some of the new things they’ll soon be seeing in their browsers. Sadly I couldn’t cover even close to everything, but the advancements I talked about are among some of the most exciting, in my opinion.

If you’re interested (or are one of the attendees who asked for a copy), click here to download my slides (in PDF format).